You’ve seen it. Cinematic montages of morning coffee captioned like movie scripts, dramatic retellings about life’s mundane events, plot twists, and people stepping into their “main character era” like they just walked onto a film set. The idea is simple- romanticize your life, see yourself as the protagonist, and bask in the spotlight of your own narrative.
Sounds empowering, right? Well, not always.
What is Main Character Syndrome, anyway?
Main Character Syndrome (MCS) isn’t an official psychological diagnosis, but it’s definitely a cultural moment. It’s the tendency to see yourself as the star of the show; where everything that happens is part of your storyline, and everyone else is just supporting characters, obviously!
A little self-importance is natural. Heck, it’s even necessary, but when does it go too far? In my own understanding, perhaps it’s when your personal story arc becomes the story. This is where things can get a bit tricky.
Reality with a Filter
Social media didn’t just encourage MCS, it put it in 4K resolution and everyone wanted social media to be the director of their lives. Platforms like TikTok and Instagram have turned everyday existence into a performance that encourage people to document their lives like a carefully curated film reel.
It was no longer about just about sharing life’s moments, it became so much about crafting a narrative and making sure they look like something straight out of an A24 film, complete with aesthetic coffee shots, dramatic text overlays, and indie soundtrack-worthy captions.
But constantly curating your life to fit a storyline can warp self-perception. You just end up spending too much time scripting your life, and before you know it, you are living for the aesthetic, not the experience.
When we’re too focused on being the main character, it’s easy to forget that everyone else is living an equally complicated, messy, meaningful lives too.
Main Character Energy Gets Lonely
There’s nothing wrong with adding a little flair to your life; after all, perspective shapes experience. And tbh, romanticizing your life can be all fun and games.
… Until it isolates you.
When everything becomes content, conversations turn into dialogue rehearsals, experiences become photo ops, and relationships can feel transactional. The pressure to constantly be someone funny, wise, effortlessly cool, and whatever else is trending, can leave little room for just being.
When you’re always trying to fit your life into an Instagrammable narrative, the mundane parts of existence (which, let’s be honest, is most of life) start feeling unbearable. The pressure to maintain a narrative can leave little room for authenticity.
Everyone knows that not every moment is a perfect, slow-motion, sun-drenched scene. Real life isn’t always cinematic. Sometimes it’s awkward, uneventful, or downright boring. Sometimes you spill coffee down your shirt five minutes into the day.
And that’s okay.
How to Be the Main Character Without Losing the Plot
Social media rewards a carefully curated version of authenticity, but true connection comes from embracing the unfiltered parts of life too. Studies have even linked excessive social media use to higher levels of narcissism and decreased empathy. This is exactly the kind of behaviour that shows up when people start treating others as background characters instead of fully realized humans with their own emotions.
When your desire to be the protagonist disconnects you from reality, or makes real-life relationships feel secondary to your own narrative, it might be time to take a step back. Because the best protagonists evolve, stay grounded, and (shockingly) care about others too.
You are the main character in your own life, but you’re not the only main character.
So, how do we embrace self-romanticization without getting lost in our own echo chamber?
- Acknowledge other storylines. Every person you meet has their own plot twists, struggles, and triumphs. Don’t just play a role in their lives, actually engage with them.
- Drop the script. Let go of the performance because not everything needs a highlight reel.
- Be real, not just relatable. If you’re having a deep conversation with a friend, maybe don’t pause to tweet about it.
- Appreciate the unedited version of life. Not every experience has to be aesthetic or romanticized. Sometimes, a cup of coffee is just a cup of coffee. No filter, no background music, just reality.
At The End Of The Day…
There’s nothing wrong with embracing your main character energy now and then. But the best stories aren’t told in isolation. The real magic happens when we recognize that we’re all protagonists in a shared world, with overlapping narratives, unexpected plot twists, and co-stars worth listening to.
Real connection is about embracing life in all its unfiltered, unedited moments. So go ahead and romanticize your life, capture the aesthetic, but don’t forget that sometimes the best scenes unfold when no one’s watching.
